A stick-figure Shakespeare comic by Mya Lixian Gosling
There are many murderers in Shakespeare's plays, but only seven who are named "Murderer". These are them.
Third Murderer is in charge of the meeting because there is only one third murderer, whereas there are three first murderers and three second murderers. Third murderers are rare.
OK, in case you haven't been paying attention for the past however many months, here's basically what happens in Romeo and Juliet:
And that's it! Thanks for taking the time to follow my re-telling of Romeo and Juliet. Tune in on Thursday, when we'll have SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT! YAY!
So you think "that's all one, the play is done", do you? NOT SO FAST! We still have some important work to do! First, let's take a look at how many people died and how many people got married, so we can scientifically determine if this is a tragedy or a comedy.
Let me crunch the numbers here... mmmhmm... yeah, this is a tragedy.
Spare a thought for poor Lady Montague, who dies offstage, is mentioned in a throwaway line that nobody pays much attention to, and is hardly ever remembered as having lived, let alone died.
If you've been too busy or impatient to follow my exhaustive Romeo and Juliet retelling over the past several months, tune in next week for a handy-dandy one-page summary of the entire play! And then we'll be done.
IT'S FINALLY OVER, GUYS.
It's all over apart from the crying. And the death/marriage count. And the one-page summary. And then it'll be over, I promise. Stay tuned...
In the previous installment of A Stick Figure Romeo and Juliet, we lost the first half of the titular couple. No prizes for guessing what happens in today's installment.
Now you know what happens in Romeo and Juliet. Stay tuned for the final installment next week, when all the surviving characters will tell each other what happened, in case anyone missed anything!
Let's see what's going on inside the tomb where it happens:
Everything could have been averted IF ONLY Friar Laurence had kept himself in better shape and was a faster runner. RUNNING SAVES LIVES, PEOPLE.
THIS IS IT.
THIS IS THE FINAL SCENE.
...ok, it's the first part of the final scene, because it's a really long final scene.
Spare a thought for poor old Paris here. He was just there to leave flowers at the grave of his crush, and now he's dead.
OK! Juliet has escaped the clutches of her family by pretending to be dead and Romeo is on his way back to Verona! What could possible prevent this from turning out happily?
Friar John, that's what.
You had ONE JOB, Friar John, and you screwed it up. ONE JOB.
