Great Old Octopus

Pray indulge a short, non-Shakespearean digression as we approach Halloween. I have a penchant for winter hats shaped like animals and/or monsters, and I recently acquired the following masterpiece from a shop in Stratford, ON.

It is, of course, a ski mask knitted to look like H.P. Lovecraft's iconic Elder God Cthulhu. Because why not? The tentacles do keep your face warm.

I've tried it out in the office a couple times, but the problem is that (with the exception of my awesome co-worker, who irresponsibly encouraged me to acquire the hat in the first place) nobody knows who Cthulhu is. Which means I've had the following conversation several times:

I'm an octopus.

We return to your regularly scheduled Shakespearean content on Wednesday.